Baseball Toaster was unplugged on February 4, 2009.
toaster 'at" humbug.com
How many decades until
The Red Sox repeat such a thrill?
This year, Murphy's Law
Will refuse to withdraw.
All things that could go wrong, will.
Last year's team was a best-seller.
The story this year is less stellar.
They'll find ways to lose,
With constant bad news,
And end by themselves in the cellar.
The noise about Jason's confession
Has served as a welcome digression
To the forthcoming news
About Yankee blues:
The team has begun its regression.
The Yankees will have a good start,
Then old guys will all fall apart.
This team isn't deep;
Their drop will be steep;
Then Cashman gets forced to depart.
With Sosa, Tejada, Palmeiro,
Their scoreboard won't show a sombrero;
Runs will be plentiful,
And sometimes be twentiful,
But their ace ain't exactly too narrow.
With Ponson--and who else have they got?
Javy will live in his squat.
Each run that they wield,
Their pitchers will yield.
Third place is Baltimore's lot.
Now that the Jays own their dome,
And their turf is less concrete, more foam,
I predict the team gels
While Hinske and Wells
Drive hundreds of baserunners home.
Roy will return to an ace,
Lilly will follow his pace.
Down to the letter,
This team will be better
And end in a strong second place.
Their dome is an ugly umbrella,
But it's sure fun to watch Lou Piniella.
I think Tampa Bay
In a shocking display,
Is baseball's brand new Cinderella.
With Kazmir, the starters will rise;
The bullpen will be a surprise;
And with Aubrey's eruption,
Combined with some Uption,
The Rays win the ultimate prize.
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